Black Girls Are Easy

I need to tell these men about themselves. I need to sit them down and say how it’s not right to chase after pussy. That they should focus more on quality conversations with women they can grow with, not the Quality Inn with women they can hoe with… Like some fear-mongering preacher who screams as he recites from the book of Revelation, I should scare these men into being honest with stories of how a good girl is worth a thousand hoes. Marginalizing one type of woman to make another type of woman happy is the real hoe shit. It’s a free country and everyone is allowed to pursue what they want to do no matter how shallow or ill-advised. You’re not winning at love due to your choices and who you choose to give your time to. Telling fairy tales that make you think it’s the world around you may help you sleep at night, but it won’t help you prosper as a person. Most young dudes don’t give a fuck about the warning labels anyway. If you’re a man that’s having fun chasing ass and your smash to rejection rate is about 60%, you don’t want to read any advice on true love. The devil’s advocate is, “that’s a hollow existence, they should be trying to do better” but who are you to judge what someone’s existence should be. Call them immature, call them sluts, but these men are happy for now, and like most males it won’t take being scared straight to slow them down, it’ll be a woman that is so remarkable that he slows down and acts right on his own. Either way, any man who isn’t with you is not your concern.

The counter that no woman with any sense would want some dude that’s been around the block is grossly inaccurate. The average man has been around the block—probably with someone you know, and when faced with discarding a good prospect for his shady past or letting it live as water under the bridge, most women get under the “His past is the past” umbrella, thus it doesn’t really matter if he’s been around the block, he’s on her block now. Men aren’t going to change because you think their actions are disgusting, they live for self, not for some ideal you think is the right way to “be a man.” Many older guys look back and say, “Yeah, I fucked up, she was a special woman…,” but if they wouldn’t have fucked up, they wouldn’t have grown into that better man. Advice is great, but experience is priceless! It works both ways. I often get hit up by women who tell me they stopped reading BGAE because they found a boyfriend, but then the follow up is it didn’t work out and they could have used some of this advice during that relationship… It’s the same mind frame with both sexes, “When I’m winning, don’t tell me shit, I got this!” Those who are getting what they want only see the upside and they rarely protect against the downside. I write plenty about the stupidity of these new niggas and try to give them wisdom, but those boys who are getting Come Over And Chill ass every weekend don’t want to hear me. I write a lot about the things that happen after you find a man and how to guard against boyfriend bullshit, but those girls who are in good relationships don’t want to hear me. It is what it is. You can’t force anyone to take advice, man or woman; you have to let them experience life.

FAIR IS A MYTH

Despite dozens of entries dedicated to men I still get some bitter Basica wagging her finger, “You need to talk less about women and more about these men because they are the problem, niggas need to do right.” What the fuck is right? The direction I’m about to turn because I don’t want to hear your bullshit. Each person has their own morals and their own ethics, but there are no set rules to love like there are set rules to driving on the road. Love is anarchy, you can literally fuck anyone you want to and not have to talk to them ever again. Despite this anarchy, some women seem to hold fast to this idea that there are rules to romance that should be followed. In this unwritten rulebook hoes should lose, sluts are shunned, aggressive women are thirsty, and men always stand behind their words. I’m sorry to break this news but there is no universal rulebook, no right and wrong, just your way of doing it versus their way of doing it. Treat someone how they treat you—it sounds good but that shit rarely happens. Quality is better than quantity—maybe to you. He’s going to miss you when you’re gone—probably not, and if he does, you’re going to let him come back anyway. We’re so caught up in The Moral of The Story Is Your Dick is Going To Fall Off… but no one’s dick ever falls off! We hope Karma catches up to those people we see as messy… but most of the time they end up just as good as you are. Man vs. Woman is one big mixture of love/hate/jealousy. People wanting people who don’t want them, which leads to revenge thoughts because humans think that anyone who doesn’t want them or appreciate them should be punished by the universe. You end up punishing yourself by harboring resentment, and that’s counterproductive to your own happiness.

The fast food workers went on strike last month for higher wages because they didn’t think they were being paid fair wages. Most people laughed at this story and said, “Go get another job that pays better.” The excuses of poor education, lack of new jobs, etc.… is how these workers responded. They don’t want a new job, they want the same job, but it should pay them more because that’s only fair. Let me tell you about fair. You can’t wipe your ass with fair because it’s make believe. These men you cry about who aren’t being fair by choosing ratchets over class are Taco Bell, you don’t have to deal with those people, you can move on IF you wanted. Instead, like that guy who complains yet stays on Chalupa duty, you keep dealing with the same machine you’ve always raged against because you are comfortable. In your stubborn backwards ass brain, it’s not on you to go find better, it’s on them to become better in the interest of fairness. Do you hear how fucking insane that sounds? I don’t care what city you live in and how small the population of educated handsome men are, you are not boxed in! If those men aren’t playing fair, then stop playing their game, genius. Those men don’t want to do better, so leave them niggas to their hollow lives while you go find fulfillment. What you’re really saying when you constantly shift the focus on those guys who have hurt you is, “Make him change his fucked up ways because I really want to be with him and it’s not FAIR that he doesn’t want to grow up and be with me.” Boo-fucking-hoo.

Your crush Deandre took you out once then fell back, now he’s taking Instagram pictures with some trashy girl who looks like she’s a welfare queen. You call your girlfriend up and say, “See this shit? This is what I’m talking about! Niggas all want garbage. I swear I wish I liked girls cus I’d be gay and done with these clowns!” Why so serious? That nigga didn’t choose you. He chose the girl that he wanted. You didn’t lose. You just didn’t win. So why are you being so sensitive in your reaction, because it’s not “fair” that he did that? I hear the chatter, “Let me be sensitive, NC, it takes time!” No I won’t let you be sensitive, because being upset or dejected for a day or two is one thing, wallowing in anger and thinking all men are going to hurt you is another. Stop letting the choices of men from your past ruin the choices you make in the future! Last week I wished someone merry Christmas and she wrote me back that she had been played three straight Christmases in a row buying gifts for dudes that didn’t get her shit so “ain’t nothing merry.” This turned into a convo first on how black men are assholes, then how certain astrological sign men are assholes, then how men in the state she lived in were assholes. She was upset, and I let her get it out… but then I said, “Maybe you shouldn’t be blowing $300 gifts on niggas whose middle names you don’t even know.” She then got mad at me and called me an asshole. The point is, we all look at outside forces be it race, birth month, city limits, but rarely look inside. Those guys scarred her, but that’s no reason to hate Christmas, hate black men, or hate Scorpios. Instead of hating all men, try educating yourself on the type of woman you are. I bet that all three of those dudes exploited something about her ego or personality, and because she doesn’t realize there are flaws in the Deathstar, she will continue to be on the losing end of the love wars.

There is one rule when it comes to love—worry about yourself.

I do not want to hear that there are no good men out here, there are no respectful men, there are no black men, there are no men that can afford to date, there are no men without kids, there are no men that want a virgin, there are no men who like girls that look like you, that talk like you, that wear their hair like you. I can’t stand to hear women with low self-esteem and a bitter outlook tell me what they can’t get, then pin it all on males! The white man ain’t stopping your money from being made and the black man ain’t stopping your heart from being loved! I want to Macaulay Culkin scream at all y’all Pre-Spartan little girls who like to place blame as if love is slavery and every man that hustled you out of pussy owes you reparations. I think it was Napoleon Hill who once said that if there is a man in your city who has earned a million dollars that means you too can earn a million dollars. If there is a girl in your city that has found love then you are capable of finding a real connection as well. I don’t want to hear that smart-ass response of, “those girls settled” or “she was probably a dummy.” When you lash out in the face of positive results, you show your true negative nature. That negative nature is why you can’t win.

Anger: You bring a lot to the table but the men you like are too blind to see it. What the fuck is wrong with them? Is it all about sex sex sex!

Frustration: You do everything a good woman is supposed to do yet lesser women are going out on real dates, getting men to treat them to things, and you have to do extra shit just to get attention.

Hopelessness: You are sick of playing games with these little boys who pretend to be men, you don’t want to go out anymore because all it does is get your hopes up. Fuck it.

Being angry about how men have treated you in the past keeps you frustrated and leaves you hopeless. In order to bandage your bruised ego or give a logical reason to how someone as smart and pretty as you got played or hasn’t had any good relationships you point the finger at men and tell yourself that Slow and Steady Wins the Race. I’m an optimistic person, I believe in happy endings, rainbows, and that Naomi Campbell’s edges can one day grow back. However, Slow and Steady doesn’t win shit when all you do is sit in the house and complain about not meeting anybody. When all you do is point to another girl and tear her down because she’s going for the gold. When all you do is criticize boys when you should be out introducing yourself to real men. It’s the dawn of a New Year, and it’s time to stop talking and start separating yourself from that pack.

Leave The Basic Shit In 2013

Do you really want to spend another year being Friends With Benefits or do you want to be a Bitch With A Man? Do you want to spend another year on social media talking about hypothetical $200 dates with men you aren’t going to meet or imagining how you will split your bills with the husband you aren’t ever going to find stuck in your house? Do you want to spend 2014, like 2013, giving up either way too much free pussy to men who wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire or giving up absolutely no pussy because you don’t trust yourself not to fall in love with the first dick you bounce on? King Bey dropped that freaky ass CD that made everybody want to drink D’Ussé and fuck in the kitchen, but she’s talking love making, you’re still stuck on ratchet sex with a “sometimey” nigga. Are you going to ride the Surfboard of some lame that doesn’t think you’re worth taking out because he’s all you got, or are you going to be discipline enough to wait for the right wave? There are some real jerk ass men out here, RAH RAH RAH- bitch we get that; but if your excuse is that ALLLLLLLLL the men you are interested in are shit, then what does that make you? If being a fly that buzzes around garbage is what makes you happy, keep buzzing, but when you are done lowering the bar and wishing that shitty men would wife you, I’ll be here. Not to place judgment, but to prove to you that if you raise that bar and Spartan the fuck up, you won’t just find one man, but several men that are ready to earn your pussy, loyalty, and love.

I don’t give all this advice for women because I think you all need more help than men. I wish more guys would listen. History shows us that most men don’t become complete until they find love, and a lot of guys out here pussy hunting are still losing at life and aren’t smart enough to realize that they can’t do it alone. Every man needs a Game Changer that inspires them to be great, be it a Yoko Ono, Kim Kardashian, or Michelle Obama (different strokes for different folks I guess). Men usually land on their feet later in life because they realized a long time ago that they create the rules—pimp in his 20’s, family man in his 30’s. This mastery over the game is why Dudes feel like they have it all figured out. They expect women to wait for them to mature only because so many weak women actually wait, and end up proving those types of guys right, “there will always be a bitch that wants me”. Fuck that, I don’t want any of you to be someone’s default bitch. I will continue to drop posts for men and I will hold guys accountable for their damage, but you ladies are who I will always speak to the most because only a woman has the intelligence and the compassion to change the hearts of men.

Finding love is not about uncovering a list of places to go where the unicorn men are standing around ready to praise you, it’s not about tricking a man into liking you with reverse psychology, it’s definitely not about using gimmicks and games to make a man want you, it’s all about following that Spartan code and learning how to take control over the only thing you can really control–yourself. I still get hit up with those “How to” questions that I talked about in the book, but going forward I’m going to assume that you all have read it because I’m not addressing any of those issues ever again. (For those of you who keep hitting me up for a freebie, those college girls who said it’s not in the budget, and those who have the hardcopy but wanted the bonus chapters, I do love you and the e-book version is at the lowest price it’s ever going to be if you go to Amazon or Barnes & Noble, but only for the next two days so click here if you want it or forever hold your beef). Black Girls Are Easy in 2014 will be the advanced Spartan course, not this “how to find a man” remedial shit. The gloves will be off and you better know how to take a punch. If you’re one of these judgmental elitist play by the rules Basicas who keeps repeating, “tell these niggas to respect us and choose us over these fast bitches cus we are morally sound and deserve it” I need you to close out your browser and never ever ever ever come back to this site again because we’re about to get raw and I wouldn’t want to offend the lies you tell yourself to keep from crying at night. A woman that’s willing to go for what she wants has positive results, a woman that simply sits on the sideline and comments on what someone else is going for has negative results. In 2014 are you going to be a conqueror or a cunt?

See You Next Year Spartans.

Thanks for reading Men Don’t Play Fair